What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
a lickalottapus

42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory

A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

A closed mouth gathers no foot.

A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

A day without sunshine is like, night.

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.

A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.

All generalizations are false, including this one.

oh yeah this one time I played this game called stick arena and Tom Fulp was playing and I was all like omg group photo.